The Two Mikes

The Two Mikes
Ever wanted to talk with someone about a book you just read? You could just join a book group and talk about it, drink a little, veer off on tangents, work back around to the book again, and finally wrap it up by picking the next book.

But what happens when the book you just read is about about hungry zombies or a haunted house, and your Eat, Pray, Love–reading friends aren’t really into reading it, much less discussing its finer points? That’s what we’re here for. We Two Mikes will be your virtual book group for discussing new and interesting and old and half-forgotten horror books.

If you want to follow along with us, look at the next forbidden book on the table and start reading.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Bonus Christmas Episode: Mike Moncada's Real-life Ghost Story

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Mike Moncada relates his true-life ghost story about his haunted sink. Happy holidays!

Special closing music: "There's a Ghost in My House" by the Yachts

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Episode 33, Nicholas Pekearo's The Wolf MAn

The Mikes talk about author Pekearo's auspicious literary debut and tragic end. We also ponder the history of werewolf literature.

It's cocktail time!

Very easy this week: buy a bottle of Zombie Zin. Drink it.

Special closing music: "Lone Wolf" by the Lone Wolves

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Bonus episode: Mike Moncada's Bookstore Rant

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In which Mr. Moncada relates a tale of annoyance.

Drink a nice glass of water.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Episode 32, Joseph Delaney's Last Apprentice Series, book 5: The Wrath of the Bloodeye

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The Mikes tackle another in Joseph Delaney's Last Apprentice series. Short and sweet discussion of a pretty long book. That's all we have to say.

Oh yes, cocktail time . . .

The Water Witch Martini

2 Parts Hendrick's Gin 1 Part Dry Vermouth splash Laphroig or Lagavulin single-malt scotch shake with ice and strain into a martini glass, drop in two blue cheese stuffed olives.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Episode 31 - The Nymphos of Rocky Flats by Mario Acevedo

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When the heck did vampires get so darn cuddly? The two Mikes ponder that most ancient of questions in Mario Acevedo's The Nympho of Rocky Flats. Is it possible that Count Chocula is the prototype of all modern vampire detectives or is some other cereal to blame? The guys find the book annoying but they talk about it anyway and ponder what it would be like to take a Short Course In Just Being Evil.

If you want to read a good gumshoe vampire story read the Vampire Papers instead!


Kundalini Noir

To one Bottle of Pilsner Beer
add five dashes of your favorite Tabasco Sauce.

Drink up! Chin, chin.

END MUSIC: What I Need by Gangstagrass on the album Gangstagrass. You can download the album for free from here.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Episode 30: Adrian Ross's The Hole of the Pit

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We have tracked down this impossibly rare, early twentieth-century horror novel and find it was worth the hunt. We shamelessly synopsize, cautiously philosophize, and generally aggrandize this great lost work of weird fiction. See it out!

It's Cocktail Time!

The Saltmarsh
in a shotglass rimmed with fleur de sel (or good salt) pitted olive (without pimento) stuffed with stilton cheese, put into glass fill with good single malt scotch (like Lagavulin) Shoot it down; don't choke.

Special closing music: "I'm a Naughty Girl," lyrics by Adrian Ross.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Episode 28: Thomas Disch's The M.D.

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The Mikes go back to the future and finally post their discussion of one of the late great Thomas Disch's horror novels set in a place not unlike Doppeltown, USA. We ponder prepubescent morality, Faustian bargains, catastrophic tooth decay, and comeuppance in general.

It's Cocktail Time!

Doctor's Orders

In a shotglass pour
1 teaspoon of Chartreuse
1 teaspoon of Pernod
1 teaspoon of aquavit
Hold your nose and shoot it down. You'll feel better in the morning.

Special closing music: "Doctor's Orders" by Carol Douglas

Thursday, August 21, 2008


Click Image To Listen ...

Take a stab in the dark with America's huggable serial killer in the first three books of the Dexter series by Jeff Lindsay. This is a very special** out-of-sequence episode brought to you from the future for your summer listening pleasure.

The Mikes enter the mind of a killer and, like good traditional men, drink the summer away. They battle over the presence of dark gods in the third book and end up with a little blood on their hands but, hey, that's what beer is for. Who's right? Mike is.

** Confession: the real episode The M.D. by Thomas Disch is lost somewhere deepin the bowels of the dank thing in the basement of the Forbidden Books Group studio. We are diligently pouring gallons of Syrup of Ipecac down its throat in hopes that it will be spewed forth—and when it does, you will hear it, right here, on Necronomipod.


Beer on the Couch

1 cold can Miller Lite, Bud, or even Hamm's
A bottle of Jack Daniels

Pop the can, take one manly gulp, while the Little Missus is making you some Tater-Tots®, refill the can to the top with Jack and gently swirl. Sit on the couch and watch an episode of Two and a Half Men with your hand down your pants.

End Music: We Are Cinders by The Molly Family. Music brought to you by Podsafe Audio.

Monday, July 14, 2008

Episode 27.0 Thomas Ligotti's The Shadow at the Bottom of the World

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Fall down the dark twisted freshly dug monster hole and claw your way through Thomas Ligotti's short story collection The Shadow at the Bottom of the World. Puppets, decaying cities, blood baths, crazy dads and creepy other-worldly plants are in the mix and the Mikes wonder if any of it matters or not. (Hint: It does.) Everything turns out in the end.

WARNING: After a year and half the boys still have not mastered perfect sound recording, so until they can afford a real engineer, they beg your pardon as you put up with all the tinny Cylon sounds in the background.


The Bad Dreamsicle

3 shots Triple Sec
1 shot vanilla vodka
1/2 shot Cream

Mix with ice, strain and pour into a martini glass while you cry for your mommy in the middle of the night.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Episode 26.0 A. M. Homes's The End of Alice

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The Mikes stretch their notion of horror with this book and get their faces rubbed in the icky underbelly of America's love life. They (bad-)touch on a lot of taboo topics as they discuss one the more forbidden books we've treated so far on the 'cast. Enjoy!

It's Cocktail Time!

The Fuzzy Bunny

3 scoops Blue Bunny vanilla ice cream

1 shots peach brandy (or schnapps)

1 shot Triple Sec

1 shot Coconut Milk

Place in blender and blend until smooth; you may need to wait until ice cream softens.

Serves three. Do not serve to children, you big pervert.

End Music: Brave Combo - The Bunny Hop

Special Thanks to Carolyn Borgen

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Episode 25.0 Toby Barlow's Sharp Teeth

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Dropping down on all fours, the Mikes gnaw and whimper and snarl over Toby Barlow's hardboiled epic werewolf poem. Come on, tear off a hunk!

It's Cocktail time!

Hair of the Dog
In a shot glass pour:
1/2 oz tequila
1/2 oz Irish whiskey

2 shakes Tabasco sauce

big pinch of salt

Grasp firmly and shoot it down like the rabid dog you are . . .

Closing music: Hair of the Dog by Nazareth

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Episode 24.0 Stephenie Meyer's Twilight

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Bravely tackling a book that a bookseller warned them away from (our first real "forbidden" book), the Mikes shamelessly hop on board another publishing juggernaut and along the way try to understand the mind of the teenage girl. We get nowhere, and ookiness results.

It's Cocktail Time!

Soul Kiss Cocktail

1 1/2 tsp Dubonnet Rouge
1 1/2 tsp OJ
3/4 ounce Bourbon
3/4 ounce Dry Vermouth

Shake with ice, strain, pour into a martini glass and prepare to lose yourself—forever.

Music: Cocktail for Two - by Spike Jones and His City Slickers on Musical Depreciation and Two Against The World performed by Rose McGowen on the Planet Terror Soundtrack.

Special credit: Guest Intro Announcer - Joanne Hathaway

Friday, April 11, 2008

Episode 23.0: Joseph Delaney's Last Apprentice Series, Books 3 and 4

Click Book Cover To Listen

By carefully avoiding girls with pointy shoes, The Mikes further their schooling in all things Spook in Joseph Delaney's The Last Apprentice Series, Book 3 - Night of the Soul Stealer and Book 4 - Attack of the Fiend. It takes a while for the guys to warm up in that cold bitter Spring of Doppletown USA but eventually the pontificating hits new heights and we all warm ourselves in the impending fires of the Apocalypse foreshadowed at the end of the book.


Blood Magic Cocktail

Crushed ice
2 shots Grenadine
3 shots OJ
1 shot Banana Liquor
1 egg white ( pasteurized - Egg Beaters or Crackleberry)

Shake it up till nice and frothy and pour into your favorite martini glass. You can garnish with a bleached white bone but we wouldn't recommend it.

End Music : Black Magic Women by Deep Purple.

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Episode 22.0 Sergei Lukyanenko's Night Watch

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Listen while the Two Mikes pontificate over this first part of the bestselling series of dark fantasy novels from Russia. We attack and retreat in the endless battle between light and dark and finally settle down to some briny vodka.

It's cocktail time!

The Chalk of Destiny

One shot chilled Russian vodka (the good stuff)
One pickled white asparagus tip

skewer the asparagus tip in the vodka. Drink. It's just that simple.

Demon Bunny says "Happy Easter!"

Saturday, March 1, 2008

Episode 21.0 Junji Ito's Uzumaki series

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Twist your minds around Junji Ito's weird, nightmare manga Uzumaki. The Mikes become entangled in the tale of a small Japanese village cursed by its obsession with all things spiral.

Our first try at a graphic novel, we surprise ourselves that we have anything to say at all—or do we?

It's Cocktail Time!

2 shots good vodka
1 shot good sake
1 long, mesmerizing coil of lemon rind

Shake the shots in crushed ice; strain into a chilled martini glass; drop in the long lemon twist. Lose yourself in its endless yellow spiraling.

Special closing music: "Twisted" by Marques Bovre and the Evil Twins, from their excellent and long-lost album Ghost Stories from Lonesome County.

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Episode 20.0 Ramsey Campbell's Ancient Images

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Take a leap off of an ancient heathen tower and join the Mikes as they mumble over horror master Ramsey Campbell's novel of cinematic sleuthwork. Like a gruesome bus tour of the scones and bones set, you'll sample wholesome bread, warm half-drunk beers and the wonders of the British highway system.

Cocktail Time!

How 'bout a Little Fire, Scarecrow!

1 bottle wheat beer
1 shot triple sec
1 tbsp 151 rum

Gently pour beer into a highball glass. Wait for the foam to settle down. Then pour in the triple sec. Pour rum into a metal spoon and, with the rest of the bottle well away from you and with full knowledge of where your fire extinguisher is and how to use it, light the rum in the spoon. Gently pour onto the top of the cocktail.

Enjoy the fine blue flame for a few seconds, but then blow it out; else your glass will be too hot to lip.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Episode 19.0 Skipp and Spector's The Light At The End

click book cover to download

Enter the tunnel of terror commonly known as the New York Subway System in Skipp and Spector's splatterpunk saga The Light At The End. The Two Mikes find fun and fault in this genre-defining novel and speculate on the effect film making has on writing the horror novel.

Cocktail Time!

Blood Blisters

1 pint grape or cherry tomatoes
1 shot pepper vodka
1 shot smoky tequila
1 shot rum

Procure a syringe and fine needle (friends with diabetic cats can be a good source). Inject a small amount of one of the above boozes into the the tomato through the vine end. Chill well and serve in a martini glass with some fine salami and fresh mozzarella cubes.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Episode 18.0: Robert McCammon's Swan Song

Join the Two Mikes as they spend the holidays in the wasteland, nearly 1000 pages of wasteland. We'll start the new year with a discussion of Robert McCammon's epic postapocalyptic tale Swan Song. We'll touch on scabs, melty jewelry, and overstuffed symbolism. Then we'll make jello.

It's Cocktail Time!

Sister Creep's Crown

3 packages of Blue Jello
2 1/2 cups Everclear
3 1/3 cups water
1/2 cup red Maraschino cherries
1/4 cup green Maraschino cherries
1/4 cup blue Maraschino cherries

Bring the water to a boil and remove from heat. Slowly stir in the Jello until dissolved. Wait 3 minutes, then stir in the Everclear.

Prepare Jello Ring ( see Jello Tips)
Pour into a prepared Jello ring-mold and refrigerate.

When the Jello is very thick but not set, add the fruits. Refrigerate again until firmly set. Un-mold when you are ready. (You can ask your mom how to do it. Have her join you in the boozy fun or bring it to a church luncheon.)

Then, after you had some, look through the center of the ring and see into the future.